Blah, Blah, and Blah

Ive been at a stand still point with my writing...I really dont know what the hell is going on..lol people asking me all the time..."whats on your mind?" what a overstatement... I think alot of shit has been pissing me off..then again little things bother me...Im a very moody person and at times is so strong it overwhelms me. I know at times i come off mean as hell but whatever if u like me enough u will deal with it...wow that was terrible...look im just expressing how i feel a this time..Its mostly because I feel My mind just stopped thinking of things to write...I changed my book alot so Im trying to fit in certain things. Ill be fine soon...just felt I have not wrote in her for a while..dont you just hate when people are sooo nice to you when ur at ur worst like pissed the F*%k off..hehe I mean let me be mad for a sec b4 u throw in ur advice...lmao I wanted to take a walk on my break at work and this annoying ass black guy that works in my building asked if he can walk with me so I told him sure..I love taking walks...especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.That worked..Lord Jesus..help me be pure...wait but not yet. And today I did not want to get up for workk....then I thought Nell dont stay in bed unless u making money in bed...ha and im no slut on the corner so I got my ass up and got ready. The holidays are coming up and I dont wanna be a Grinch that stole Christmas type shit butttt..I just dont feel like seeing all the family members and the long sit down talks about how you should live your life and how its not decent as a female to have so many tatts... I mean happiness to me is having a big loving, caring, closeknit family in another state. Im sure some will agree...lol sorry today is morbid. Im getting married soon..thats a positive in this blog and I cant wait...ive been getting alot of advice from married couples..good and bad. but hey thats whats in everything right..this one man wrote me and said dont be mad if your husband does not talk to you ever in ur marriage..I said why? wtf does that mean..he said he does not want to interrupt you...I laughed. god bless blogheadsss and keep checking out my chapters on www.nellzstories.blogspot.com Chapter 3 coming this week...


P.S. I still feel like being a meanie....IF YOUR HEART WAS BROKEN YOU WOULD BE DEAD SO SHUT UP.

I came, I saw, I conquered....OBAMA 08...HISTORY

Well Well Well...shit im happy..lol Wow I still cant believe I lived to see history....well of course Ive been around for other things that will be in our children's textbooks but they were not so positive such as 9/11. Congrats America I know this was a good move. Most of the things that we see now like yesterday in the world....had been declared impossible before they were done. When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way like Obama you will command the attention of the world.....clearly proven. And i hope this history will be kind to our future...oh do i hope! We followed the light people which made us leave our old world...well i should say it made us start our departure..hehe. I would not attach to much importance to the negative and ignorant people who dont like this new shine that took place last night...its sad. I just hope we can see all that was said from his mouth that helped alter our decision to lean more to his view..I know it wont take a day but I just hope we see something..some change..I know he feels very good about what he overcame...The greater the difficulty the better the feeling is when accomlished. I know sometimes history never looks like history at time when ur living through it, but i hope this time it willlll.Like our elders always say The man who swims against the stream will always know the strength of it. well blogheads...god bless..see you soon.. I started my short stories also!! check it out negative or postive feedback who cares..it helps!!!

TRUST ME...

90% of men will go back to wifey,main or whatever name you want to call it if they cheated....i never seen in my lifetime a guy being with that girl they cheated on they main with.......ladies...hoes..tricks..sluts...etc. if your fucking with somebody else man (for one its really indecent)....dont talk shit about the girl with all that blah blah...you look stupid as well...or worst..now im aware that there are all types of different situations but shit imma speak on the main one...A guy with a girl he loves her he cares about her more than any next bitch...but he cheated anyway..lol it happens not to say its ok but hell the shit happens. yea wifey may look stupid through many people eyes..but there is always more to the story that others dont see.. but come on...the other chick was just time spent. Some woman stand by they man...through it all...now if this guy or girl is making the same mistakes and cheating on u every other damn day thats a totally different story. but we all make mistakes...forgiveness is the key. Nowwwwww I forgive but I dont forget.. because there is no revenge so complete as forgiveness. For all the Ladies and men who have been cheated on..it sucks but you will always see if that person is about you or not. Cant explain how but only you will know! :)I think that im a very imaginative person but im very farrrr from being gullable. Dont get it twisted at all!! It took me a GOOD minnnnnute to get how i am...as in being warmhearted and being a cool ass wifey... in the begining i use to just say I forgive my man... but I would reheat his sins for breakfast....not cool or ok .. If u say you forgive ur girlfrined or boyfriend dont just make it a statement... Always put urself in they shoes...I know we all did something wrong and wish that other person would forgive you and they dont...but u wish you could let them be in ur brain to see how sorry you really are...(THIS IS FOR REAL PEOPLE NOT THOSE WHO HURT PEOPLE FOR THE HELL OF IT)for those who cannot forgive others....you break the bridge that you must pass yourself....everybody has need to be forgiven. God Bless BLOGHEADS...ITS ALWAYS NICE SEEIN OLD COUPLEs THAT BEEN TOGETHER FOR 62 PLUS YEARS...I WISH MORE PEOPLE WERE LIKE THAT!!


FAIR ENOUGH RIGHT..












p.s. My lil mama won best costume contest at her school YAY!!!

Try not to make this leave a bad taste in your mouth....

We are kinda a broke nation.....everybody is passionate about the election...America is not what it use to be..and im not going to apologize about how I see the world. I think if Obama or McCain wins half of the country will be upset...so the question everybody keeps asking me....if McCain lose will there be riots.....hmm its more of a 50/50 type of thing...Its like ride or die people with whatever the outcome is..Please dont question my tactics..hehe. I mean im utterly excessive with things that I want to talk about and how i feel...serious shit. Of course there are people well aloott of people who dont want Obama to win....Its like they have that guilty pleasure on how they feel..lol. Cast a ballot...vote..ITs a competition so they will both do what they gotta do to be heard or for you to be one with them....which can lead to a few lies but hell...we gotta deal with it on both outcomes...A man does what he must or wants in spite of his personal consequences...in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures and that is the basis of all human morality. yeaaaa that was a qoute from John F. Kennedy. and i cant help but to agree with that.
America will never seek a permission slip to defend the security of our people. How far is that to being true...its like they show us things that they want us to see...and hide the others bc of the questions that will follow. You ever just sit there and think about all the secrets that we dont know about our presidents and our country shit is crazy. ITs so scary that i quickly chase it out my head the second my brain starts the thinking process. I told myself i would never write about this bc i know alot will not agree and this and that..but hell whatever...TASTE MY THOUGHTS...SWALLOW MY WORDS...AND IF YOU DONT LIKE IT SPIT IT BACK AT ME. I guess for those who dont reach out aggressively may be the ones who are at the bottom of being heard or whatever else. sorry to say but i may be one of those at times...at times I just leave things alone but that does not mean that i dont care of understand it. I mean shit i keep reading between the lines and sometimes i still cant agree..sorry. I guess that person or thing can say to me...I WOULD HAVE ANSWERED YOUR LETTER BUT YOU DID NOT SEND ONE. i would have had to take that for what it was worth without a fight. A little of topic but..umm is it me or am i the only one who thinks something could have been built where the towers fell...iono but sometimes damage done in one year can take 20 years to repair...ughh im having a weird day...things are not working my way and i hate that..selfish..i know. I had this old lady come up to me and tell me ahhh the youthful days.. I was like huh she was like you have so much to learn in this life and asked me if i voted early.. i lied...hehe only because i knew a long asss story would follow and i was not trying to stand around and smell her perfume that smell like she got it at her 10 year bday party. (that was mean sorry) but sometimes when old people speak it is not because of the sweetness of words in their mouths it is because they see or seen something which we do not see. I told her take care..and went back to my desk to type this blog.....Im done...I want to go home and make a nice cup of vanilla chi tea and cuddle with my hubby... god bless blogheads...xoxo


P.S. I was listening to the radio and this 22 year old was complaining about how she lives with her parents and they ask her to pay all the bills and what not..i thought that shit was funny...like move ur ass out then..ur 22.. and for the parents..they know alot about PARENTAL PIMPING I SEE...

::Deep Cuts::

Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me....

yea whoever made that one up is going to hell...what a lie. words do hurt...alot... and I dont know one person who would say it never hurt them at least one time in their life.

I always knew there was a reason why I did not really care for too many people in my life...most of them are seasonal and a few stick around til the end...NO MATTER WHAT.


I love the relationship I carry with my fiance...Im his bestfriend and he is mine..Im down for him with anything...somebody hurts him I feel like i was his shadow. Things are coming up with us and Im very blessed with that. Now, we are not perfect at all..I know i make mistakes but what would the world be if everybody was perfect. I dont come off to hurt anybody at all...so i think that if people feel that they were betrayed or hurt by another friend..why not use that word we call COMMUNICATION.. thats very important in any kind of friendship...get to the bottom of things and in the end if they still feel they dont want anything to do with that person u can walk away knowing at least u brought it all to the table and there is nothing left to do. To talk to somebody u gotta be ears and mouth not just one...then that turns into a one sided argument. The future comes one day at a time...and u cant change the speed of that...If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it change your attitude....and don't complain after. Somebody once told me "He that will not apply new remedies must expect new evils". WOw...very true people. I came to alot of points in my life when i had to change just to save or Cherish something I want to keep..and i dont think anything is wrong with a little change...When your through changing..you are THROUGH.. take it for whats it worth...Change is the rhythm of living....Think to the beat! Any change even a change for the best is always followed by drawbacks and discomforts. We all have big changes in our lives that are more or less a second chance....So go for it.. god bless and for the friends I lost...I wish you the best in Life.

P.S. Onnn another noteee here are some pics for the photoshooottt enjoy......

::SQD::

Squad deep....its like sumn u neva heard......There is nothing negative about the name Squad Deep. We are known from all aspects of promotions such as Clubs, Magazines, Energy Drinks, Clothing, Artist, and The Street Team. I am the Secretary for the company and I help out with organizing things.

We just did a squad deep photo shoot, its the 3rd official one now The pictures were taking by Ian Designs and James p.they are UNTOUCHABLE..... And it was my 1st time behind the camera..I love to take pics overall but I was soo nervous the 1st few takes I was shaking but got into it and I feel I did great. I took some with my homie NANA and my fiance David. They are the models but I jumped in lmao.those pics are coming soon.. and more info about SQUAD DEEP..Business as Usual....

SHOUT OUT TO MY HOMEGIRL KEVA, SHE JUST DID HER FASHION SHOW IN MIAMI THIS LAST WEEKEND!! IT WAS GREAT PICS BELOWWW.













SHE DESIGNS ALL OF THE CLOTHES YOU SEEN IN THE PICS....KEVA BY KEVA J



It takes alot to express your dreams to somebody else. Is like thinking....damn what will they think or say? Is it too out this world what I want to begin...crazyy.. If you take responsibility of yourself and actions you will develop some kind of motivation to overcome your dreams. Just believe in yourself and when that takes place all of those questions that will be asked 2morrow will be answered today. Stand up for what u believe in and for respect and freedom of what you will display in a business or just in general. geezzz today is monday and i hate mondaysss :( well enjoy the pics!! the pics from the shoot will be up soon...God Bless

::Been Missing::

geezz I have not wrote in here for a while...Im sorry ive been going through alot of personal things. Well I really wish I could just write everything that has been on my mind since then but that would be a long ass blog that you would read half way and be like yea yea...lol. Well I learned since ive been away that I need to have more faith in things. I have not been praying every night like i should..but that will change.Faith has to do with things that are not seen and hope with things that are not at hand. They say Your faithfulness makes you trustworthy to God....i know he wont give me something i cant handle but i do wish he did not trust me so much. I think everyone has a different definition for faith....but most overall just say faith is not worrying. Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother... I was at that point for a good time...I feel everybody should be honest about how they feel and not act like shit is all good all the time..like I LOVE MY LIFE or MY LIFE IS SO PERFECT..hehe not even rich folks feel that at all times..i feel its just a front but thats just me... now dont get me wrong I do value and care about my life but shit negative things come about on occasions..But the certain situations that came about with me taking this time off was a lot of stress and downtime...I had to take faith one step at a time...I did not have to see the whole staircase but I had to take that 1st step. This word FAITH means so much more to me now..and It help me get through what I needed to overcome...Its like it has enough light for those who want to believe and enough shawdows to blind those who dont.... Imma leave it at that...If we all believe alot can change in this world...shit we cant even control a classroom full of people so it seems hard to get arcoss to everybody about this..but it can be done!!! Love u guys!! xoxo

P.S. I got my 5th tattoo the other day..many more to come and my hubby got some more also...damn he is hella sexi...hmmm ok..god bless blogheads